Desire Based Marketing, “Towards Motivated”
How do you make them FEEL with your Content?
Desire Focused (rather than Pain Focused)
When you think about any negative message that you have ever received, whether it’s been in recent years, or it’s someone else’s marketing, or it’s a partner or something that happened as a child – when you really dissect it, you can find an underlying motivation.
The message came because they either wanted you to buy something, or to do something, or to feel something that benefited them.
So the message about being lazy, “get off your butt” and do something, that benefits someone else – someone who wants you to do something for them or be something that benefits them.
And when we take this through the lens of marketing, we can really think about how we have been marketed to as women.
We’re given a lot of messages about our flaws, we’re given a lot of messages about areas that we need to improve – things that we need to be better at, ways that we need to look better, and things that we need to be able to do.
And we often come away with the message that we’re not organized enough, we’re not motivated enough, we’re not intelligent enough, we’re not goal driven enough.
And the message can seep down if you’re not attentive to it. (Yes, we are all already hypnotized about something, and often it wasn’t a positive message).
So as marketers ourselves, I think it’s really important that we consider how much the language that we use is “away motivated,” talking about pain points, talking about the Yuck, talking about the negative side of an experience.
While there are some heart-centered marketers who aren’t just out to dial up people’s wounds or sense of inadequacy, sadly there are plenty who capitalize on those wounds to make a sale. We don’t want or need to do that.
The underlying message becomes that they’re not good enough, they’re not driven enough, they’re not motivated enough, they’re not organized enough, they need to get their sh** together, they need help to get off their butt, they need to be held “accountable” like a little child standing in the corner for being naughty.
We don’t need those things. We aren’t inherently bad or naughty and need someone to put us in time-out to get things done. Usually rather than naughty and needing held accountable, we are… exhausted and needing sleep, confused and needing guidance, frightened and needing confidence, distracted and needing inspiration.
We don’t need those messages.
And we definitely don’t need to give those messages to others.
#1 – People really do mostly remember how you make them FEEL.
There’s a certain way that we’re used to writing and there’s a certain way that we’re used to speaking, and we don’t intend to harm – we don’t think about the way that it makes them feel.
But if you go back to the root belief that people will mostly remember how you make them feel more than anything else, the language you choose becomes powerful and important.
Do they come away from it feeling like crap, feeling like, geez, I really need to get myself together?
I think it’s really important to be attentive to that.
So the “toward motivated” marketing, it is desire based marketing. What it is they want, how it is they want to feel and it’s usually a good feeling – a high vibe, like they want to feel more confident, more empowered, like they’re on top of things. And maybe you can help them get there (rather than dialing up what a hot mess they feel like today).
And often the piece that we really are missing is the confidence and it isn’t necessarily that we need more motivation, or we need someone to hold us accountable.
It’s just something to think about, just food for thought to consider the message that you’re sending underneath the words. What is the ultimate feeling that someone will take away?
As they’re reading your message, what is the way that you’re making them feel with the language that’s being used and the tone that’s being used?
#2 – The humility to express you’re not the “guru.”
Sometimes, I read things when I’m just scrolling on Facebook, and I’m getting like ads popped to me from other random marketers. It’s often a message like, you’re doing something wrong, you don’t know enough, you can’t succeed with what you’re currently doing.
And that’s not really true. Yes, it’s always helpful to get a little bit more knowledge, it’s always helpful to get a little bit more insight. We can certainly learn some new things, but there’s not some be all and end all thing that’s going to magically fix anything.
Success is more of an eclectic accumulation of little tools and tips and tricks that you acquire along the way.
And a heck of a lot of it has to do with experience, and trial and error.
And the trial and error is actually really important.
It’s a really important part of the journey.
Sometimes we hear about how we should “stop throwing spaghetti at the wall.” (I’m Italian and I don’t know who are all these people wasting perfectly good spaghetti, but anyway).
Sometimes the pasta throwing is really the path. Weird, right?
There are some things you can ONLY learn by doing, and even failing at.
It’s okay to throw some spaghetti (could we use something else, next time?).
It’s okay to practice, trial, fail, and do it again.
I recently experienced this less-than-fun lesson seeking a new pillow.
Just read the reviews, right? SURE.
After physically sleeping on EIGHT different pillows… Well, you get it. Sometimes YOU have to walk the Path. It has to be YOUR journey, your experience. Sometimes one must simply squish the pillow oneself with one’s own tired head.
That doesn’t mean Guidance and Support aren’t extremely worthy investments. THEY ARE!
But they’ll meld together with everything else you’ve read, seen, tried, and lived.
And the same is true for your clients.
We do them – and ourselves – a huge disservice by accidentally pretending to the ONE guru they need to have a better life, biz, etc.
(I say accidentally because I know we all have the best intentions here, and want to be ethical, authentic marketers).
#3 – Dissect the Marketing Story.
When there’s a message that someone knows something more than you or they are making you feel like you’re inadequate in some way – not motivated enough, not organized enough, not knowledgeable enough – there’s usually a reason, and we can call B.S.
We can take apart the story rather than adopting it and taking it onto ourselves.
This is true as much in your personal world as in your business and marketing and being marketed to.
Once you become aware of the threads of a Story, they can be dissected, pulled apart, and seen for what they are.
And in turn, we as marketers can take on the responsibility of the stories that we’re generating and perpetuating.
We can focus our clever strategies and insights into what it is the client DESIRES, and wishes to move towards.
We can incentivize with EXCITEMENT about the possibilities available to them.
We can give them HOPE for something they are wishing for. Help them to OPEN to the new horizons that exist, rather than focusing them down on the mire they feel stuck in.
So at the end of the day, how do you want to make them FEEL?
P.S.
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